The Polar Ends
by ladylibre
Summary: The sequel to BLACK ICE, a Roseward-based alternate prequel to the Twilight Saga. After their near-miss in the mountains, Roseward is on opposite sides of a widening emotional line. As fate pulls them in different directions, will they find the peace they so desperately need? Or will they forever remain estranged by misunderstanding? Canon couples appear :-)
1. Chapter 1: Adrift

**Disclaimer: SM owns everything in the Twiverse, but please don't steal my plot.**

**Welcome back, Roseward fans! I present "The Polar Ends," the next part of the "Black Ice" saga. Hope you enjoy it!**

**Chapter 1: Adrift**

**Edward's POV**

Time, I have found, is a cruel mistress.

It has no regard for my preference, no ability to heal or hasten.

Instead it mocks, holding my heart hostage beneath a thin veneer of chronological oncern.

A heart I neither deserve nor need.

For of what use is a heart in the chest of the dead?

"Is he still out there?"

The female's cautious voice reaches me despite her attempts at a whisper. Her mind is equal parts alarmed and affectionate, flooding mine with thoughts of the caramel-haired creature I left behind.

I wonder for the first time how she is.

I wonder if she wonders about me.

I wonder if it matters.

"Yes." Her partner replies, his thoughts less benevolent. "And I am ready to confront him."

"Don't, dearest." She lays a comforting hand against his arm. "He must have come here for a reason."

"And as this is our land and our realm," he counters, "would it not behoove him to make those reasons known?"

"Perhaps he is unable." She is too close to the truth, and I contemplate leaving for the second time in as many days. "Perhaps silence is all he can offer, and we should accept it."

Her mate frowns, unhinged by her compassionate logic. Though a very different man than the one who recommended me, I see their similarities. They are well-matched, well-mated, and in possession of the very thing I covet and lack.

I hate them both.

"This will not stand when our family returns," he warns, his mind drifting toward a trio of blondes with exotic eyes. "They will demand answers."

"They will follow our lead," she replies gently. "And we must set a proper example. Starting with this." She tugs him away from the window. "No more staring."

He does not move, and she uses more force. "Eleazar?"

"In a moment_._" His thoughts are tender toward his bride though his voice is harsh. "I feel there is something about him I am missing."

"You think he might be gifted?"

He shakes his head. "I cannot tell at this distance. He is just out of range, as if intentionally holding himself aloft. That alone gives me pause."

"Did Carlisle's letter say anything of import?"

At the mention of his old friend's name, Eleazar smiles. "He would sooner resort of a life of human-guzzling than divulge more than is necessary. But from his tone, I suspect you are correct about the young man's need for silence."

"Then let us leave him be." She laces her fingers through his, squeezing lightly. He turns toward her, his heart melting at the sight, and smiles.

"As you wish, Carmenita." He cups her face and presses soft, meaningful kisses against her mouth.

My hand darts out to crush the first thing it touches.

I apologize to the broken tree, burying myself deeper in the snow-capped quiet, wishing I could catch my death.

—T—P—E—

I do not bother counting the days since I left.

Fed.

Moved.

Smiled.

Though the latter statistic needs no calculation.

I left my smiles with her.

A sharp pain strikes me in the heart, and I curse myself for remembering.

"_It did not happen. She does not exist."_

But the pronoun is enough to unravel the halting progress I have made over the past several weeks, and I press the heels of my hands into my eyes.

In vain do I struggle, for the images appear unbidden, stronger than I remember.

The luxurious gold of her hair.

The confident elegance of her walk.

The husky lilt of her laugh.

I try to drive the memories away, knowing their damning destination, but I cannot.

A hapless child playing a man's game.

The sloping curve of her bare shoulder.

The darkening of her eyes before a kiss.

The luscious heat of her mouth.

I tremble where I sit, folding in on myself as the end approaches.

The gentle strength of her touch.

The moist stroke of her tongue.

The wanting ache in her sigh.

And then…

Again…

Always…

"_I can do this for him. I must. It is why I was created."_

A corresponding roar escapes my chest before I can stop it, rattling the rocks around me. I will them to fall, wishing they could crush me and end my suffering.

But they break against me like petty waves on a jagged shore, and I thrust my hands in my hair.

When will the torture end?

"Ah, here you are."

At the vocal intrusion, my eyes snap open.

I relax, seeing only a solid wall of white before me.

My mind has finally lost its grip on reality, and the thought cheers me.

I may survive yet.

"Why are you hiding out here alone?"

The sultry sound seems to double in volume the second time, and I turn my aching head toward it.

And as its source comes into view, I am dumbfounded by the sight.

**And so it begins. What do you think?**


	2. Chapter 2: Blonde Ambition

**Disclaimer: SM owns everything in the Twiverse, but please don't steal my plot.**

**So Edward has a visitor, hmmm? Let's see what this is about…**

**Chapter 2: Blonde Ambition**

**Edward's POV**

I blink once to disprove my sight.

It is wrong and must be.

For at least three reasons.

One.

_She_ does not know where I am.

Two.

If she did, she would have no reason to be kind.

Three.

And most importantly.

I do not deserve to see her again.

Not after the way I left.

After that_._

After all.

After all which is nothing at all.

Because I left.

So I blink again and focus, relieved to discover my error.

This is a vision but not my dream.

It is not _she _ but a keen approximation.

Blonde.

Beautiful.

Beyond my ken.

I turn away again, despairing.

It is too much, too soon.

Yet not enough.

Nothing will ever be enough.

Ever again.

"_He is aware of my presence, yet he does not reply. How odd!"_

She is curious, unafraid, and tries again aloud.

"Are you mute?" Her tone is airy despite its depth. "Blind? Deaf?"

I say nothing, vaguely annoyed by her refusal to leave.

"Nomadic? European?" She gasps as if inspired. "Gay?"

I am unable to suppress a snort, earning a knowing nod. "I should have known. The pretty ones always are."

Begrudgingly I face her. "Why are you here?"

"Because 'here' is my home, so I can be anywhere I want." She flops beside me, amused by my refusal to engage. "What is your excuse?"

She goads me on purpose, scooting closer and daring me to topple sideways. And despite my best attempts to avoid it, my lips form a small smile. "You are rather irritating."

"And you are intentionally alone in a snow-covered wilderness instead of inside the house where there is warmth, laughter, and clean clothes, all in ample supply." Her elegant nose wrinkles. "Tell me there is a reason for such deprivation."

_She_ appears behind my lids as if summoned: fiery eyes caressing and chaffing me.

"There is a reason."

"Care to share?"

"No."

I expect my curtness to ward her off, but she remains, sympathetic and steady with no need for details.

Were I worthy of amiable company, she might do.

"Fair enough," she replies at great length, by which point I have nearly lost the thread of conversation. "Might I at least learn your name?"

"As if Carlisle didn't already inform you."

"That is in no way a proper introduction." She springs to her feet, the movement powerful in its grace. "And I am nothing if not proper."

She curtsies with a thorough roll of her eyes, bullying the corners of my mouth upward again.

"As you wish." I come slowly upright, swiping the snow and soot from my clothes as best I can. "I am Edward Masen."

She notes my use of a different surname than the doctor's. "Katrina. Or Kate." Another eye roll. "A pleasure to meet you, Edward."

She sticks out her hand with a smile, and I jump back, a low growl escaping me. The notion of touching her, of touching anyone else ever again is repugnant enough to make my insides quiver with fear and loathing.

To say nothing of this woman saying my name.

A woman other than _her._

Unbearable.

"It is all right." I come to notice Kate's hands are raised in a gentle gesture of surrender. "A polite head nod will suffice."

Aghast I close my eyes, freshly swaddled in a new layer of shame.

I should not have come here.

"All is truly well. There is no need for such censure." Her whisper is kind, making it worse. "You are averse to physical touch, and that is your right." She drops her hands, suddenly smiling. "Though it would certainly be a first around here."

Her mind shifts, and the fleshly images drop me to my knees, gasping for breath.

Too much, too soon.

Too close.

Too close to us.

To _her_.

Her skin, her touch.

Her lips, her sighs.

Her name.

I can almost taste it.

Feel it on my tongue.

I need it.

Need her.

_Rosalie… _

_Please… forgive me.  
_

"What is it?" Kate's voice startles me again as she drops into a crouch beside me, careful to avoid contact. "Do you need something? Are you wounded? Is there something…"

"I… I just need to be alone."

"Are you certain?" She considers calling the rest of her clan, a bombardment of carnality and concern I could in no wise handle. "I would hate to see you in a…"

"Katrina." I am a hair's breadth from begging. "Please."

She comes to her feet with furrowed brows but does not reply. Through her gaze, I see what I have become: a shattered husk of a man unfit for company or conversation. And though the loss of _her_ society burns like venom through virgin veins, I am pleased by my decline.

It is the least I can do.

"One month," she says. "You have one more month to idle undisturbed while I excuse your absence."

"I appreciate the thought." I consider looking up but cannot bear to raise my head. "But I do not need you to cover me."

"You do, young one. More than you realize." There is a too long beat of silence in which she debates how much to reveal, unaware I see it all. "That is, I came as a preliminary scout, an envoy of sorts. And you"—her eyes roam my slim frame, cocking an eyebrow—"are too enigmatic not to explore." She tsks under her breath. "She's gonna have a field day."

I pinch the bridge of my nose, releasing it when I am assailed by a memory of _her_ mimicking the action. "Does your sister not understand the concept of a man wanting to be alone?"

"No, I am afraid she does not. Nor, might I add, did I supply our relational connection." She glances sidelong at me, her interest fully piqued. "A telepath, then? Even better."

I spit a low oath, willing a volcano to rise from the slush and swallow me whole.

"Should you choose to stay on, it will be nice to have another gifted creature here," she says warmly. "I do tire of being the only one."

"And what is your gift?"

She smirks down at me. "As if you have not already heard my thoughts."

The triggered trap is sprung, and it is too late to run.

I am caught.

"_Yes, you heard my thoughts! But you know nothing of their meaning, their origin, or their importance relative to the greater truth…"_

"Don't be sullen, not-Cullen," she smiles. "I am teasing."

I can be nothing but sullen, for _she_ is not done.

"_And if you walk away now… If you leave me now, what you heard is all you will ever know. Of me."_

"Let us say my talent is… quite shocking!"

The shock is I have lasted this long.

That I have survived the end I handed us both.

"_As you have said, let it be so."_

"Edward?"

Again I die.

Eternally dead, lifeless am I.

But without _her_ I die.

Always and again.

"Edward?"

"Yes?" My reply is too high and too loud, and Kate stares at me in alarm. "Where were you?"

"Lost in thought, one might say." I clear my throat, forcing a smile. "So you have a tactile gift."

"I do."

"How does it work?"

"Perhaps I will show you. Some other time."

She is worried for me, a hopeless sojourner on her family's land, and I cannot bear it.

"Return to the house, Katrina." I can no longer feign wellness. "You are wasting your time."

"My time is mine to waste or spend according to my whims," she says with authority. "As is yours, I suppose."

She sighs, her sympathy enveloping me like an ill-fitting cloak.

"One month, Edward," she proclaims. "Then I shall return to retrieve you. Or send Carmen, perhaps."

She seems reluctant to allow her sisters near me, the one sister in particular, and I am once again awash in her willingness to protect me.

Protection I have in no way earned.

"I cannot allow you to trouble yourself." I meet her artless eyes, unable to hold them. "I shall come to the house by then."

"Do you promise?"

"I promise."

"Then I leave you to it."

She does not believe me but takes immediate leave, and it is just as well.

My word is as useless as I am.

But in the wake of her departure, another promise whispers in the wind.

Another promise from a former life.

"_Edward, you will not lose me." Her soft sincerity seeps into my aching heart, searching for a safe place to rest. "No matter what happens, you will never lose me."_

_I grip her more surely, holding on to everything she is, praying she will pardon all I am not. _

_I know the latter to be impossible, yet I cannot stop myself from murmuring, "You promise?"_

_She lifts my head, searing the words on my soul as she stares right into it. "I promise."_

_She _promised.

And she meant it.

For she was a seraph of uncommon veracity.

A flawless truth made flesh.

It is I who defied, who made her lie.

Choking our fantasy with my inescapable inadequacies.

"_If I must lose you… let it not be by my own foolish hands."_

Did I not say those words before she gave her vow?

What sort of creature forecasts the end, knows the carnage it will cause, then uses the innocent to bring it to pass?

The sort who needs vacate this place before poisoning another well.

Repaying their kindness with inevitable decay.

Resolved, I raise my eyes and come to my feet.

It is time to go.

"_Do not do to them what you have done to me, Edward. They do not deserve it."_

I halt in my tracks, whipping my head around as I search the terrain in vain.

She is not here.

Cannot be here.

I know this.

Yet…

Is she not everywhere I am?

My shadow and shame?

My passion and pain?

The darling dove I plucked and twisted into an albatross to hang about my worthless neck?

My dead bones liquefy, and I sink to the frozen floor, unhinged by the audial apparition.

"Neither do you, love." I break on the endearment. "Neither do you."

The sobs return with a vengeance, and I baptize myself in their tearless sting. Wallowing willfully in her chastisement, I accept my fate with open hands.

It is the very least and all I deserve.

**Poor Edward! He's in a bad place but seems to have found a friend in Kate. And that's a very good thing.**

**Working on the next ALWD update, but Bella's voice eludes me. Meanwhile I hit 17k in Nano yesterday *high-fives self* and am aiming for 20k by tomorrow. **

**Wish me luck in both and I'll see you soon! xoxo**


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